Writing Journal 16/01/18

‘Did you know, when you sleep your body paralyses itself?’
‘No!’
‘Yeah.’
‘Really?’
‘Yes.’
‘Why?’
‘So you don’t go walking into traffic or go off and fly a plane.’
‘Do you know how to fly a plane?’
‘No.’
‘Really?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Well, why would your body paralyse itself if you can’t fly a plane?’
‘Alright well then it does it in case you try and drive a car.’
‘Try? You can’t drive either?’
‘No, I can drive, you nitwit. Go walk in traffic.’
‘Well if I was asleep I wouldn’t be able to.’
‘Because you’d be paralysed.’
‘No. Because I wouldn’t be able to see. My eyes would be closed.’
‘Right. Of course.’
‘Don’t you sleep with your eyes closed?’
‘Yes. Yes I do.’
‘Be scary walking in on you sleeping with your eyes open. Then I’d really be paralysed.’
‘But you’d be awake.’
‘When?’
‘If you walked in and saw me sleeping with my eyes open.’
‘Right. Wait, but if I was paralysed that would mean I was asleep.’
‘But that would mean your eyes would be closed.’
‘But how would I know that you’re sleeping with your eyes open?’
‘Well, you wouldn’t.’
‘Well, then I wouldn’t be paralysed.’
‘So you’d be awake?’
‘You want another beer?’
‘I think I’d better.’